A Camp Respite -- For Parents, Too

by Melinda Tuhus | July 7, 2006 9:27 AM | | Comments (1)

The volunteers who run Camp Totokett are getting ready for their 11th season at Killam's Point in Branford, July 24-28. The 65 kids who come out for a week of day camp range in age from 6 to 15; they are mostly from New Haven and are mostly black and Latino. Their family members â€" parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles â€" are the faces of AIDS in the city. Some have died, and the rest have been living with the disease for many years, since effective treatment was introduced a decade ago.

Ask a kid (like Adrianna Rumley, 7, at left in top photo) what she likes about the summer camp and you'll hear, "Swimming, walking on the rocks, being with my friends." Ask a mother â€" especially a mother with AIDS â€" what she likes about her kids' summer camp, and you're most likely to hear, "I can get a rest."


The camp is the inspired collaboration between New Haven-based AIDS Interfaith Network, which for the past 19 years has been serving mostly low-income individuals and families affected by AIDS, and the First Congregational Church of Branford.

Organizer Barbara Colley said her church wanted to do something for these kids. "They are not ill themselves, so they're often overlooked," she said. "Some are rushed into adult caretaker roles and have lost some of their childhood because of the situation they find themselves in. This is a chance to give them back their childhood. It's a respite from the caretaking role and provides some happy memories to carry them through the rough times a lot of them face."

The genius of the program is that it pairs a teenage counselor one-on-one with each camper. "It wasn't planned that way," Colley said, "but we had high school kids who volunteered and that turned out to be one of the best aspects of the camp â€" the campers thrive on that attention." Some friendships were forged where counselors have kept in touch with their "counselee" throughout the year. Colley works on the camp year-round, writing grants, taking calls from volunteers, dealing with the paperwork. The camp provides transportation for the New Haven kids.

Seeing his counselor, "Matt N.," was the first thing Jerome Rumley (top in photo) mentioned about why he's looking forward to camp this year. Anthony Rivera (left in photo), Jerome's uncle (both are 11) talked about camp all year long. He said he's looking forward to "swimming, seeing my friends, and getting away from home." Their cousin, Ruthie Rivera, also 11, hasn't been as often as the boys but hopes to go this year.

Colley said a few years ago, the volunteer staff changed the program so that just the younger kids stay at Killam's Point all week â€" swimming, fishing from the rocks on shore, making arts and crafts â€" while the kids 12 and older visit sites around the region like amusement parks, ending with a day of community service.

The week used to end on Saturday, when all the campers' family members were invited out for a picnic. Killam's Point is a narrow, rocky finger of land, extending into Long Island Sound, and tents were set up by the water, where everyone feasted on hot dogs, burgers, corn on the cob and watermelon.

Olga Gonzales â€" Anthony's mother, Ruthie's aunt and Jerome and Adrianna's grandma â€" has had full-blown AIDS for years. "I like it when the kids go away," she said. She's been taking lots of powerful drugs for over a decade, and it's hard to get the combinations right. She's exhausted all the time, and almost never leaves her apartment, which she shares with Anthony, an older daughter and her baby, and various other relatives who come and go.

When she was pressed a little, some enthusiasm creeped into her voice. "I like Family Day. I get to see other people I haven't seen in a long time. I get to see what the kids have done at camp all week, and see them excited to be with their friends. And we get to eat."

Adrianna's sister, Karizma Wright (right in photo at top), is only 4, so she'll have to wait two more years for her turn at Camp Totokett, which will no doubt still be offering the same wonderful memories to children in 2008.

Adrianna Rumley.

Comments

Posted by: Edward Ochman | August 13, 2006 4:31 PM

Dear Melinda Tuhus,
My daugter Chelsea and I have been participating at Camp Totokett for the past ten years. Chelsea is a group leader, and I am the Camp's Fishing instructor/counselor. Unfortunatly, the Saturday Picnic that you referenced was eliminated two years ago, and despite objections from myself and others involved with the camp has not been re-instituted. I always felt that the Saturday was an important and very relevent aspect of the Camp, and meant a great deal to the Children, as well as their family members. We are planning once again to try to convince the directors of the Camp to reinstitute the Saturday Picnic. As it stands now there is a picnic on Friday which does NOT include any family members. The camp now ends on Friday instead of Saturday. Any help that you could give would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Sicerely, Edward Ochman

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