Starbucks, Nice. Furniture-Grabber, Not Nice
by Gina Coggio | May 2, 2006 4:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)
One foot still in New Haven, one foot now pointing toward Thailand, the Independent’s schoolteacher/ diarist feels the love from a barista and a New Mexico school, but not from the woman who takes her printer.
May 2, 2006
The protocol for ordering coffee at the downtown Starbucks has changed. Now when you order, you have to give them your name so they can write it on the cup. They already do this at the Woodbridge Starbucks, and ones in Boston, and I thought it was a nice touch…makes my morning a little more personal. So this morning when I ordered my coffee and she asked for my name, I was surprised and happy. We even talked to each other.
Maybe I shouldn’t sound so surprised about talking to someone in the morning at a coffee place, but I am. My routine everyday has been a silent one, other than when I’m talking to myself or asking for a coffee. I like the idea of someone asking me my name; I think other people did, too, because the people I waited in line with were chatty and friendly, looking me in my eye. It was a really nice change of pace. I felt warm and friendly, too. Like it was going to be a good day.
On Thursday and Friday, our school is having visitors come from New Mexico and from N.Y.C. Since our school’s magnet theme is citizenship, using the curriculum Facing History and Ourselves, and since the New Mexico school wants to adopt a similar program as ours, we’ve opened our doors to them and to the Facing History headquarters in New York. It will be exciting to welcome visitors from so far away; and in a way, it makes me feel like I work at a really special place. I know I work with special, amazing people. But to have our school recognized by people across the country as a model for something they might like to do is inspiring and makes me feel proud.
I heard from a school in Thailand last night. I could be leaving as early as Aug. 1. I have so much stuff to get rid of. Anyone need a car?
Speaking of getting rid of stuff, over vacation I cleaned out my apartment, rearranged furniture, and got rid of some big pieces of furniture—just put them up for grabs on the curb outside of my house. A bookcase, two chairs, two tables… It felt so good to have them out of my sight! Everything was gone in the matter of an hour, and hopefully they’ve gone to good use. At one point, I looked out of my window and saw a minivan pull into my driveway, loading everything up onto and inside of it. I smiled, seeing that a family was taking it, so I went out and asked if they had any use for a printer. I was debating putting it up for sale eventually, but the family looked so nice and they had kids. Maybe they could really use the printer. It felt better to me to give it away rather than save it for later to sell.
The woman in the driver’s seat stuck her head out the window.
“You got anything else?” with a tone in her voice implying I might have sacks of gem stones or bars of gold lining my living room walls, maybe a plasma TV that I just didn’t want anymore.
My heart sank. I had hoped they’d be appreciative and thankful, maybe show some surprise at the fact that I had almost an entire living room set of furniture out on the sidewalk. Not selfish or choosy. I wanted to tell her my home wasn’t a department store and maybe she should say thank you. But of course, I didn’t. I told her I was planning on selling the other things in my house.
“Yeah, we’ll take the printer,” she said, as if it were some kind of consolation prize instead of a perfectly good color printer, complete with USB cables to connect to the computer.
Yuck, I thought. People are rude. She had tainted my day with a small grey cloud. The truth is, I would rather have given the printer away—I’d be glad to give anything away if I knew it was going to someone who was nice, appreciative, humble. I didn’t put anything else out on the sidewalk that day. It was a one-time deal, spoiled by my reaction to someone’s greediness. I know that’s a strong word, “greedy;” but when I feel like I’m doing something good—and when I want to do something good—and someone doesn’t recognize it as good, then it sucks. And then I don’t want to do good anymore.
Share this story
Comments
Posted by: Don Lawrence | May 3, 2006 7:45 AM
I'm submitting this comment in the hopes that one of your readers will discover a safe, easy, and convenient method to donate gently used home furnishings to families truly in need of assistance.
The National Furniture Bank Association is the home furnishings industry’s unified non-profit organization, representing furniture banks throughout the country. Furniture banks are non-profit organizations which collect gently used home furnishings from the general public, then give it to families in need. Typical clients of furniture banks are victims of natural disasters such as Hurricane Katrina; women and children escaping domestic violence; families living below the poverty line; and thousands of others covering the whole spectrum of people in need.
NFBA affiliates distribute more than 1,000,000 pieces of furniture to over 100,000 families each year. Furniture banks also keep thousands of tons of used furniture out of incinerators and landfills annually.
No child in America should have to sleep on the floor. Kathy Ireland is the Help1Up Ambassador. Visit Help1Up.org to find a furniture bank near you. In nearly all cases, we'll come to your house and gladly accept your furniture donation, and give you a tax donation receipt!
Posted by: Miss | May 4, 2006 10:41 AM
Oh I wish I'd known about NFBA!! I'll keep them in mind before I pack up to leave for real. Thank you!!
Posted by: eleanor | June 22, 2006 1:52 PM
It sounds like were this a fairy tale, this woman (who took your printer) would have been turned into a frog by now, having so clearly failed the kindness-to-others test.
What you experienced has been my experience often as well. I've tried to put myself in their position and thought, well, if someone was being generous to me, maybe I wouldn't be willing to give them the warm-fuzzies as a reward, either. Maybe that would be painful; maybe it would too blatantly say to them and myself, yes, you're up there and I'm down here, you're the do-gooder and I'm the needy. Maybe when I try to carry out the interaction with myself in the role of the giver, then responding the way I wish they would requires that they accept the role of the receiver and that that is perceived as an uncomfortable, inferior place to be. And so they refuse to humor me with that particular foil relationship. They respond instead in whatever way keeps us each equal, perhaps saying to each other as they drive away, "Geez, she could have said thank you for us hauling her stuff away so she doesn't have to."
Anyway, I enjoyed reading about someone else having this experience (I think you write very well) and finding out about the NFBA, so thank you. Good luck in Thailand.
Posted by: Mo | July 11, 2006 12:26 PM
I followed up Don's post with a quick search for a furniture bank nearby, but unfortunately the closest one is in Brooklyn. Needing to get rid of my couch however, I persisted and called the New Haven Salvation army. Very quickly they gave me a phone # to schedule a pick-up, 865-0511 ext.300, and my couch should be on its way.
Sorry, Comments are closed for this entry
Special Sections
Legal Notices
Some Favorite Sites
- 5 Snacks After 10
- Abram Katz
- African independent
- At Risk for HD
- Back To Basics
- Branford Eagle
- Business NH
- CT Business Litig
- CT Energy Blog
- CT Enviro Headlines
- CT Green Scene
- CT Law Tribune
- CT Local Politics
- CT News Junkie
- CTV
- ChiTown Daily News
- Conn Art Scene
- Cornwall-On-Hudson
- Crosscut
- Design New Haven
- Gotham Gazette
- Josiah Brown
- Karman Turn
- La Voz Hispana
- Laurel Club
- Len's Lens
- Magrisso Forte
- Media Attache
- Media Nation
- Medical Intelligence
- Middletown Eye
- MinnPost
- My Left Nutmeg
- NBC 30
- NH Advocate
- NH Register
- NH Review of Books
- Northampton Media
- OneWorld
- Only In Bridgeport
- Oral History Project
- Pittsburgh Dish
- Reddit NH
- See Click Fix
- Smartpill Design
- SoWhay Sonata
- St. Louis Beacon
- Tom Ficklin
- VT Digger
- Valley Independent Sentinel
- Voice of SD
- WFSB-TV
- WPKN Today
- WTNH
- Yale Daily News
- barista
Government/ Community Links
- ALSO-Cornerstone
- Advocate Calendar
- Ald. Meetings
- All Our Kin
- Alliance Theatre
- Arts & Ideas
- Arts Council
- Artspace
- Bar Assn.
- Beth El Keser Israel
- Bikur Cholim
- Bioregional Group
- Birthright
- BlackinCT
- Boys & Girls Club
- CCA
- CCNE
- CTRIBAT
- Chamber of Commerce
- Children's Museum
- City Point
- City of New Haven
- CitySeed
- Citywide Youth
- Columbus House
- Community Loan Fund
- Community Mediation
- ConnCAN
- DESK
- Dariba Referrals
- Data Haven
- Domestic Violence Srvcs.
- Election Volunteers
- Elm City Cycling
- Elm Shakespeare
- Empower NH
- Ezra Academy
- Fellowship Place
- Food Bank
- Friends of East Rock Park
- GAVA
- Habitat For Humanity
- Halsey Associates
- Hill Health
- Hilltop Brigade
- IRIS
- Info New Haven
- Jewish Federation
- Job Finder
- Junta
- LEAP
- Leeway
- Mary Wade
- Music Haven
- NH Land Trust
- NH Museum
- NH Safe Streets
- NH Scholarship Fund
- NH Youth Soccer
- NH/ Leon Sister City
- NHCAN
- Neighborhood Music School
- New Haven 828
- New Haven Reads
- New Life Corp.
- PAR Newsletter
- Parents Available to Help
- Planned Parenthood
- Police
- Preservation Trust
- Public Allies CT
- Public Library
- Public Schools
- Public Works
- ROOF
- Rail Trains Ecology
- Register Calendar
- Rotary
- SAMA
- STRIVE-New Haven
- Sister Cities
- Social Media Club
- Solar Youth
- Soul-O-Ettes
- South Central Behavioral Health Network
- Squash Haven
- Temple Emanuel
- United Way
- Upper State Street Association
- Urban Design League
- Urban Resources Initiative
- Visiting Nurse Association of South Central Connecticut
- W'ville Synagogue
- W. Square Blockwatch
- WalkBIkeCT
- Westville Chabad
- Westville Renaissance
- Wooster Sq MT
- Workforce Alliance
- Yale Events
- Yeshiva NH Shul
- Yeshiva of NH
- Youth Continuum
Flyerboard
Sponsors
N.H.I. Site Design & Development
NHI Store
Buy New Haven Independent Stuff
News Feed
Movable Type 3.35