Parents Unite in Parking Lot
by Allan Appel | June 13, 2008 2:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Virginia Cordero and her sixth-grade daughter, the marvelous Xena, arrived early for school at St. Martin de Porres Academy. Xena, a member of the Hairspray Club, dedicated to studying and performing the eponymous musical, was going to New York to see the real thing. Her mom had to rush off to finish up the first full house remodeling she and her sons’ fledgling company had undertaken.
It was a big day, and rounding out of another year of success and changes in their lives and in the life of their school, a year chronicled as part of the Independent’s series on parental involvement in local education. (Some past stories here and here.)
Looking back on that year, Cordero and St. Martin’s principal Mary Surowiecki stopped for a moment to share their thoughts about what makes for effective parent involvement. Here’s what they agreed on, in no particular priority order:
Parents need to be valued, paid attention to, cultivated, their help solicited. If they feel valued, they’ll contribute value. This is codified in a written and unwritten contract that every child’s parent must contribute eight hours a year minimum to the school in volunteer time. Some, like Virginia, conduct edextracurricular activities.
Many other parents, said Surowiecki, contributed cleaning, painting, moving assistance, when the school moved from its big one-floor box at a church in Hamden to the historic St. Peter’s Church compound.
Kids need to know, said the principal, that their parents have a stake in the school.
Size and physical structure of the school matter deeply in relating to parents formally and informally. In their previous building in Hamden, the principal said, everything occurred on one floor, all the arriving and the departing and the teaching, so the parents ran into each other and into the staff informally. “In this new building I deliberately placed my office on the third floor to be among the kids. But that removes me from the parents who are arriving on the first floor.”
Surowiecki said she was seriously considering moving down to the first floor to remedy this. “Then again,” she added, “the downside is that I won’t be among the kids as much as I want.” Maybe the second floor.
Smaller schools work better. In a small school everyone counts, and therefore more people come forward. The current 75 to 80 kids, Surowiecki said, has proven itself too large. So they are planning a school of 60 kids in four grades, five to eight, for next year. “Part of the reason is that we are committed, financially, to getting our kids a quality high school education. If we have a class of 15 graduating the eighth grade, as we will for the first time next year, it’s likely eight of those kids will be going to private high schools requiring tuition. That’s a lot of money to raise, but we guarantee it.” That’s therefore part of the reason to downsize, but the main one is to have a smaller family where everyone knows each other.
A kid’s significant other can be not only a parent, but a grandparent. Any significant other who wants to contribute something to the school. Several grandmothers are active at St. Martin de Porres and one girl’s big sister is her “significant other” at the school. She comes in once a week and teaches the other kids double Dutch jump-roping.
Be positive. It’s always nice, said the principal to have your first communications on a positive note. “We need to build that before or in case an issue comes up.” Part of this means accepting peoples’ contributions in their own ways.
Cordero and Surowiecki estimated that only a quarter of the parents come to the monthly open forums or parent nights. But then several parents who don’t show up to these meetings come in and teach regular courses in African-American dance or sports.
Virginia Cordero does both, extracurricular work and regular attendance at meetings, although this year, due to the new business she is building with her sons, the Monday sewing and embroidering group she has run was not held; it will be next year
Use the parking lot, as it were, literally and figuratively, to create a sense of cohesion. Parents picking up or dropping off kids often chat among themselves, without teachers or administrators being present. “Just the other day,” Cordero said, “the parents talked about what was happening with the girls; and then we caught up about the boys. It brings people together.
The fact that several buses now bring many of the kids to school - without the parents - said Surowiecki, undermined this informal community-building in the parking lot, but there was no way to do without the buses.
The smaller scale will enable the school, the principal said, to become a kind of extended family, which is the goal. The difference, of course, is that if a family, if a parent does not reciprocate, refuses to work with the staff on a matter, for example, of concern, then the school has the right not to renew the contract with the parent and child; in other words, a family where a member can get kicked out. But this rarely happens.
Xena said, before she departed for New York, that she was looking forward to studying French next year. This year she is doing top notch work all across the curriculum and continuing to play clarinet in the band.
Previous installments in the Independent’s series on parental involvement in local schools:
The World’s At King/Robinson’s Door
Parents Give Schools Thumbs Up
Mom’s Business Grows, Along With Xena
7 Parents Get Their Own “Head Start”
Moonlight Readers in West Rock
Joshua’s Parents Take Him To “Foie Gras” Service
Parents Question Skittles Suspension
Parents Want Say On Suspensions
Son Gets Pills; Suspension Policy Targeted
Dad Goes To The Top, Gets Results
Parents, M&Ms Join In Math Lesson
Brandon Aims For The Blue Shirt
Night-Shift Waitress Hangs Up Apron
Dad Meets The Teachers. All Of ‘Em
Ms. Lopez Moves Brandon’s Seat
Night-Shift Waitress Gets Xena To Class On Time
Fifth-Graders Get “Amistadized”
Board of Ed To Parents: Get Involved!
Task Force Hones Plan for Kids
The New St. Martin DePorres Comes Home
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