Fathers March Down Dixwell
by Melinda Tuhus | June 23, 2009 11:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (20)
Clentis Sead marched for fatherhood — as a means to help the community stop kids from shooting each other, and to build his own “heart relationship” with his two children after a three-year jail stint.
Sead (pictured) joined some 75 particiants Monday evening — almost all male — in the Brotherhood Leadership Summit’s Fatherhood “We Care” march along Dixwell Avenue from the old Q House to the Lincoln Bassett School. The Summit is a project of the Christian Community Commission.
The point of the march: men promising to take a more active role in their children’s lives.
Sead’s children — son Jalin, 16, and daughter Diamond, 14 — live with their mother in Norwalk. Sead said he sees them on weekends and in the summer.” I talk to them every day on the phone,” he added.
What does he talk to them about? “Violence is all around, but I tell them to stay outside the box. You don’t have to follow the crowd — focus on God.” Sead said his kids, though they witness violence in their neighborhood, have managed not to get involved in it.
“They see all the trouble I’ve been through, and then they see the turnaround,” he noted. Sead said he served a three-year prison term for a nonviolent drug offense.
The march was called for the day after Father’s Day as yet another protest against gun violence in which, all too often, teens and even pre-teens are both the victims and the perpetrators. Dixwell Alderman Greg Morehead and Newhallville Alderman Charles Blango both marched with their sons.
Along the march route, down Dixwell Avenue to Bassett Street, some bystanders and motorists clapped and honked their horns. Those exhibiting such enthusiasm seemed to be disproportionately female.
Few if any men joined in along the route, although Timothy Brown (pictured), a case manager and staffer of the Male Involvement Network at New Haven Family Alliance, did his best to pass out brochures all along the way. He invited fathers to participate in a 12-week parenting course.
Brown said he grew up without a dad, but was lucky to have male teachers mentor him in both second and sixth grade at Katherine Brennan School.
“I think the biggest obstacle facing African-American men in our community is that a lot of them grow up without fathers,” said CCC leader Minister Donald Morris. “A lot of them, their fathers are incarcerated. It’s like a generational inheritance.”
Some groups that call for men to take leadership in their families (e.g., Promise Keepers) subordinate their wives. But Minister Morris Sumpter (pictured) offered a different vision. “Christ links the husband and wife,” he said. “They should be partners, to challenge and support each other according to the will of God.”
He said he found God while serving a five-year prison sentence for receiving stolen property. He’s been with his fiancĂ©e for over two years, and considers himself the stepfather to her two children, including Charles Phillips, 6 (pictured), who accompanied him on the march.
A few teenaged boys walked in the march, not necessarily happily. One marcher who “encouraged” his 13-year-old son to come said, “He’d walk to another state for a rap concert, so I told him he could do this.”
Attorney Michael Jefferson spoke at the rally at Lincoln Bassett School. He told a story (true, he said) about the transfer of a community of elephants from one part of Africa to another. First the females and young elephants were moved, but it was harder to corral the big bull elephants. When the family groups were separated, the story went, the male juveniles started acting out. It was only when the bulls were finally reunited with the herd that they were able to bring the rambunctious youths into line.
“Do you hear what I’m saying?” he shouted to the crowd.
He said the community and the media too often blame young people for the problems of violence. “None of us will be a perfect father,” he told the men assembled, “but we can be caring dads and we can help each other. We have to reach out and re-engage.”
A number of speakers called for economic development in their community to provide jobs so men could support their families.
Brother Kevin Muhammed (pictured) electrified the crowd in a speech that included references not only to black-on-black shootings, but to increasing suicides among black males, and the increase in violence among ever-younger boys.
Muhammed, who is principal of Wexler Grant school, said he was there to give black students a fighting chance of survival, as Jefferson provides the same chance to the African American clients he represents in a white-dominated court system.
“Real knowledge starts off with the knowledge of who you are,” he said.
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Comments
Posted by: anthony | June 23, 2009 11:40 AM
This is awesome.
Posted by: Hood Rebel | June 23, 2009 12:40 PM
This is some of what it takes! Good start!
We need community engagement to solve community problems. We cannot afford to sit on the side lines watch our community deteriorate to disconnected youth and have others dictate the solutions.
Let's stay active on our streets, in our homes, in the education of our children, and take control of the issues impacting our community!
Posted by: lance | June 23, 2009 1:37 PM
i hope this has some impact because quite frankly i'm tired of having to foot the bill for that portion of the black community that isn't pulling their own weight. better birth control and in some cases mandatory birth control might curtail some of these problems.
i read an interesting article regarding the naval academy. it alleged that minorities with sat scores 200 points lower and letter grade averages a full letter lower than whites were granted automatic admission whereas the more qualified whites had to fight it out for remaining spots. so the long and the short of it is if a black person keeps their head in the game they get the advantage over the white person by virtue of their skin color.
this whole white guy is the enemy thing that is often the not so subtle message of black leaders isn't helping matters by the way.
Posted by: anon | June 23, 2009 2:07 PM
Great march. Jobs don't come out of nowhere though. There is a formula: Attractive communities + walkable streets + transportation + business encouragement = job creation.
Transportation = These days, more city residents work outside the city: if they don't have accessible and affordable transport, they don't have those opportunities. They can't find work outside the neighborhood, since it just takes too long or costs to much to get there. And then they can't bring their salaries back to the area to support it.
Attractive neighborhoods = these multiply business opportunities because each existing business can then draw on a much larger market area. People are willing to walk a lot farther to a business if they have a comfortable, safe, pedestrian-oriented route. If you have stuff to see along the way and don't feel like you'll get run over getting there, you'll walk 2-3 times as far than you will if you don't. Might as well hop into a car and go up to Hamden Plaza if there's no reason to take an extra 5 minutes and walk to support your local business. You need to improve the safety of the neighborhood with enforcement, lighting, a better criminal justice system, opportunities for youth, and safer street designs that encourage people to be out and have "eyes on the street."
Walkable = You need infrastructure for the people who don't drive everywhere (kids, elderly, workers without cars... actually the majority of people in New Haven). Part of making an area attractive and comfortable, but New Haven is "behind the curve" on this when compared to other cities like New York, Cambridge, Northampton, Portland, Chicago, Philadelphia, Greenwich, West Hartford, etc. -- in fact, as a direct result, is losing jobs to those places. We don't even have enough money to maintain the painted crosswalks that already exist.
Business encouragement = keep the mill rate low, cut the bureaucracy, hold all departments accountable for showing results and keeping costs only to what is necessary, have strong LCI regulations. Use good community reporting to show that you are actually making progress on the things above, so people feel comfortable putting their money down in New Haven instead of taking it to Hamden or West Haven.
Start providing the basics, and the jobs will follow. Look at how many new businesses and jobs have been created downtown, because of the successful efforts of the city, residents and Yale on making that neighborhood such a walkable community.
Posted by: anon2 | June 23, 2009 4:31 PM
anon: i can't agree more! well put. in the past year we have seen an actual study "proving" that broken windows theory holds true and that the physical environment (not just infrastructure, but broken windows, boarded up windows, overgrown grass, broken fences, pealing paint, broken lighting) is more of a deterrent on crime than citations or increased police presence.
we need more people using seeclickfix to help LCI do their jobs; we need a department that is up to the task and not getting downsized; we need a viewpoint that sees the big picture and doesn't use budgetary problems and "not enough police" as a technical brush off. there are new ways of doing business as a community, and we all can come together to repair our neighborhoods.
Posted by: KELLS | June 23, 2009 4:57 PM
Lance:
Do you ever have anything positive to say? Knock it off already. This is a great step in the right direction and I applaud any and everyone who had anything to do with it!!!
Posted by: anon | June 23, 2009 6:44 PM
you are on2 something. fixing the environment definitely fixes other problems. and can create jobs that way too
Posted by: lance | June 23, 2009 8:18 PM
kells....I walked the beat in housing projects and worked the courts, and i see how it goes. the deadbeat moms and dads out there are multiplying at a far geater rate than self suffient responsible people, and the liberals, obama chief among them, are in a big hurry to give out more food stamps, section 8, these so called stimulus jobs that amount to "busy work". it's going to come to a head in this country unless we curtail the welfare cycle by stopping government handouts and procreation by deadbeats of all races.
go to work and support your ... kids. how hard of a concept is that to grasp?
Posted by: City Hall | June 23, 2009 10:58 PM
ANON-
STOP PREACHING START DOING, ALSO, MARCH AND MARCH SOME MORE THIS IS A LAUGHABLE PARADE TO AVOID REAL COMMUNITY AND FAMILY ISSUES.
Posted by: jack | June 24, 2009 10:28 AM
How tragic to watch an entire community snuff itself out and blame it all on someone else.
Posted by: elmo | June 24, 2009 10:57 AM
I'm glad that the elected leaders in our community like Greg Morehead and Charlie Blango are involved in this march. They are great examples to the community.
Posted by: Seth P. | June 24, 2009 12:19 PM
I think that all of the gentlemen involved should be saluted. Although the teenagers were not enthusiastic, they were present. They will understand when they get older.
I am not a father yet, but I understand what it is to grow up without one. All of us need to reach out to our young men to make sure that they are learning the TRUE essence of manhood.
Posted by: Richard F. Jones | June 24, 2009 12:19 PM
I believe that this is a step in the right direction,but enough marches and demonstrations.What is needed are some God fearing, no nonsense,bull elephant black man that can get into these kids heads.It takes a village to raise a child.
There is a serious need for black men of New Haven to step up to the plate and take action.Each time a youth gets in trouble,it sounds as though there is a cry for help.
It's time for the community to police itself. If you wait on the politicians and the police nothing will get done.
Black men of New Haven "WHERE ARE YOU"? Are you gong to stand by and watch your community be destroyed from within?
If you know of a single black woman that is having a hard time raising her kids(dicipline)then we have an obligation to offer our help.
There is a serious need for "STRONG" black men to grab the bull by horns and see to it that our youth are prepared to take their place in society.
As I stated in my last communication that there is a serious need to do all that can possibly be done to save the Q HOUSE and develop it into the
DIXWELL TECHNOOLGY CENTER,and the DIXWELL CENTER FOR THE ARTS. This can be developed in way that youth can receive a technical education. They could learn some real skills such as carpentry,plumbing,electrician,learn how to read blue prints, or bcome a general contractor. Every day life skills can also be taught,such as basic reading,basic math,computer skills,how to open a bank account,write and balance a check book,etc
The age of technology is here you either get with the program or get left behind.I am a direct receipant of technology. I'm employed as CAD designer(Computer Aided Design).The skills that I have made it possible to have a good life style with an excellent income that has provided for my family. I have my father to thank for giving me the discipline and for giving me the math skills that have helped me thus far. I'm not living in New Haven at present,but I would be willing to come when can to offer my assistance.I really belive that saving the Q HOUSE and developing a good design would be a step in the right direction. Finally,the youth of today represent our future not only in New Haven but in the nation as well.
Well, black men of New Haven are you going to sit
or get of the pot.There is a lot of work that has to be done."IF YOU FAIL TO PLAN,THEN YOU PLAN TO FAIL"
Bo Jones
Washington D.C. richard.jones.ctr@afncr.af.mil
Posted by: Hood Rebel | June 24, 2009 12:22 PM
A food delivery person was shot on West Read this week. This is outrageous, abominable, and totally unacceptable in our community. I mean, the perp could have just taken the damn food. What punk-ass would fire a gun at a defenseless person?!
Nonetheless, we have to do more work with the police and residents to weed out these destroyers!
Posted by: CrissCross | June 24, 2009 3:01 PM
The march is a step in the right direction. But, I don't think that identifying two elected officials...as the examples...for us to follow is the way...each participant is a great example...the many speakers had great insight on what we need to do...in our communities...we have a long way to go and seeing regular men get out here and march...lets me know that it starts with us...I just hope this event doesnt turn out to be a Gospelfest Setup...I mean it is that time of year and elections are around the corner...our communities cant afford to be exploited anymmore!
Posted by: WoW | June 24, 2009 8:43 PM
Hey Hood, I like your remark. People have to step up to the plate and truly get involve. Hey Paul Bass you not right, your evil.
Posted by: THREEFIFTHS | June 24, 2009 9:14 PM
LANCE
I'm tired of having to foot the bill fot that portion of the White Community that have robbed and stolen from the people, Like George Bush SR.
and his two sons Jeb Bush and Neil bush,When they made out with all that money from the Savings and Loan Crisis in which I and Others are pay this bill to this day,In fact Check this out for the
story.
http://rationalrevolution.net/war/bush_family_and_the_s.htm
You said better birth control and in some cases mandatory birth control,Wow you sound like Trick'y
Dick,Opps Richard Nixon,You heard the tapes
You sound like him!!! You said go to work and support your kids, How hard of a concept is that
to grasp. How hard,Very hard Check this out,Here are the people on my block who have try to live by you concept and here is where than stand:
Five people over 20years at AT&T laid off
Seven people over 20years laid off from winchester.
Three people laid off from Bayer,One had Over 30 years,And six from Pratt and Whitney.In fact the people from AT&T told me that in the next few years the whole company will be leaving this high
tax state.And all of them told me that there 401
is worthless. And We can not forget Enron!!!! But I guess you don't keep up with the unemployment in this country,Because if you did you would see that we have a new breed of the poor and it is growing.Last what do you think about the bill that we all have to foot for crooked Billy White and Gang!!!
Posted by: Consti2amend | June 24, 2009 10:38 PM
When I grew up, near Winchester and Starr Streets, ALL of the neighbors watched out for each other AND their children! I can remember Mrs. B{name withheld} asking if I had permission to cross the road. I turned and ran home. As I got in, my mother just answered the phone, it was Mrs. B letting my mother know I was looking to cross the road {I was indeed!}. My mother sent me to my room, BUT what a lesson! A neighbor concerned enough to call and let my mother know. Now, NO one will watch for you, and certainly NO ONE will call your house! What for? To get yelled at by your mother? Not likely!
BUT I do applaud their {the marcher's} actions! IT is about time we as fathers stood up for ourselves, faults and all, to let our families know they mean more to us than they {and WE} know!
By the way, "Some groups that call for men to take leadership in their families (e.g., Promise Keepers) subordinate their wives." Since when can a two headed ANYTHING make a "common" decision? Read your Bible! The husband must be obeyed. NOT for any "sexist" rule, but typically, the man of the house WAS the "bread winner" and was responsible for HIS families actions. The wife should listen to the husband. BUT, the wife SHOULD, when there are NO children around, be able to question the husband! This is to "enforce" a unified parental role in their children!
ANY change in this WILL lead to a rebellion in the children! As they WILL pit one parent against another.
Posted by: LanceWho | June 25, 2009 1:24 AM
I am glad Lance is retired and not walking the housing projects anymore. ...
Now, if he was to leave is computer for abit and come out into the sunlight, he could run for mayor.
Posted by: lance | June 25, 2009 11:39 AM
i really wish the independent wouldn't edit the comments.
and for the above poster, it's c-o-u-g-h-l-i-n.
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