Mother’s Day Mass Q: New Pope, Female Deacons?

Let the new pope, Leo XIV, consider elevating Catholic women to become deacons, Jeannie Barry said in the lobby of St. Mary’s Church on Hillhouse Avenue.

Whoa! Not so fast, said Barry’s daughter, Emily Sullivan. Sullivan is a graduate of Thomas Aquinas College, in theology. ​“Women are equal in dignity but distinctive in their church roles,” she said. ​“And the church is bound by scripture and tradition.”

Or as Carlos Rodriguez put it more succinctly an hour earlier and at a different church across town, on his way into an 11:00 a.m. Spanish-language mass at St. Francis on Ferry Street in Fair Haven: ​“It doesn’t matter who the pope is. The pope is the pope and God is God.”

Those were some of the wide-ranging Mother’s Day morning thoughts and opinions — many (at least to this reporter) surprisingly cautious and conservative and let’s‑wait-and-see — on the selection of Leo XIV as the successor to Pope Francis and the new leader of the world’s Catholics.

These New Haven churchgoers’ perspectives touched on the question of whether Leo will continue or break from the progressive, modernizing, close-to-the-poor leadership approach of Francis. They also shed light on the debate around what role women should be allowed to play in the church.

This reporter spoke with parishioners and visitors on their way to mass at four of New Haven’s Catholic churches: St. Joseph’s on Edwards Street, St. Mary’s on Hillhouse Avenue, St. Stanislaus on Eld Street and State, and St. Francis on Ferry Street in Fair Haven.

All these churches — along with St. Aedan’s in Westville, St. Anthony in the Hill and St. Michael’s in Wooster Square — are part now of the blended and consolidated Blessed Michael McGivney Parish, which lists all masses citywide.

The earliest this Sunday was at St. Joseph’s on Edwards Street, where Cheshire residents Steven and Helen Tine and their daughter Theresa were crossing the parking lot to the 8:30 a.m. mass. They were genuinely excited that there is now an American pope who was immediately relatable to this family.

“I know the places where he’s lived,” said Helen of Leo XIV’s Chicago roots. ​“It’s similar to the area on the south side where we lived. He was a substitute teacher at St. Rita’s. I know St. Rita’s! Already I feel a personal connection.”

David Candido, a self-employed cosmetologist who grew up at St. Joseph’s and was also heading in Sunday morning, agreed. An American pope is exciting. He also likes that the pope is relatively young and likely will be welcoming to everyone, he said.

“I hope he supports immigrants, but only those who seek citizenship by the rules,” Candido added.

And what about the role of women, which Pope Francis, it was reported, was revisiting?

“Gender-wise the church is archaic,” Candido responded. ​“There are only nuns.” If Pope Leo considered elevating the role of women, Candido said he would be very okay with that. He likes the idea of women becoming deacons, which would permit them to help priests at mass, deliver homilies, and even officiate at baptisms.

Nearby Nate Brown, another young man with Chicago roots, was rushing up the steps, late for the beginning of mass. He reported he had checked out a 2005 photo clip of Robert Francis Prevost, now Pope Leo XIV, then attending a Chicago White Sox game, canonical evidence, apparently, that settled a dispute as to whether the new pope sides with the southside Sox or Cubs.

“He was wearing a cap, dressed like a regular guy,” said Brown.

Meanwhile over at St. Francis, on Ferry Street, long-time Fair Havener Dennis Silvestri was attending the 9:30 a.m. English-with-some-Spanish mass and wasn’t having any of the White Sox, first-North-American pope hype.

“He’s too new still,” he offered. ​“You’ve got to see his positions. Let’s see after the hype.”

Of all the issues, however, the one Silvestri expressed the strongest position on was women. ​“You’ve got to get them [more involved as leaders] in the church.

“Now women can only be Eucharistic ministers,” a more limited role than a deacon, which is usually handing out the wine and wafer at mass. ​“But a deacon can read gospel scripture, do more helping the priest from behind the altar,” said Silvestri. He is all for it and hopes the new pope might move in that direction.

At the side entrance to St. Francis, however, Susanna Castro, an attendee at mass here for 29 years, was a little more cautious. ​“I hope and pray he is a good pope. Whatever he does, he’ll be following God’s guidance.”

Both Castro and Ken Dagliere, who emerged from his car as Castro entered the church, both expressed the hope the new pope would follow in his predecessor’s footsteps, but with a kind of apolitical, spiritual humility regarding the process.

“Who am I to judge God’s choice?” he said. And then he added, ​“This church is wonderful. A melting pot, like America.”

Back on Eld Street for the 10:00 a.m. mass in Polish, I arrived in time to catch brothers Tom and John Zane making their way up the ramp entrance to the church’s main lobby.

Although they no longer had the alacrity of the altar boys they both once had been at ​“St. Stan’s,” their memories of the first Polish Pope, John Paul II, the large Polish community that used to throng the church, and their regard for beauty of the place were evident.

And no, said John Zane, he wasn’t eager for the new pope to follow in Francis’s footsteps. ​“A pope should stick to matters of religion and serve people.”

His brother concurred. ​“Popes are religious leaders, not political leaders.”

About specific issues? ​“Let’s wait and see,” said John.

Meanwhile inside the church, the new pope’s photograph was already displayed, with messages in Polish, in the marbled lobby, and the church on Mother’s Day Sunday morning was full.

After the Zanes took their seats, a young couple entered with a small baby in tow. They both said they are excited by the new American-born pope, but the man of the couple said whatever the pope does he hopes it does not include the advancing of the role of women.

“It’s what I know,” he said. ​“The way I was brought up.” The mom holding the baby seemed not to agree but she held her peace and they went in to pray and celebrate mass.

I got back to St. Mary’s on Hillhouse just in time to chat with the family of Jeannie Barry. Barry’s family members had come down from New Hampshire to see Barry’s new condo in City Point and to celebrate Mother’s Day with her — at a picnic they planned after the mass.

Barry’s older daughter Emily had met her husband Joe Sullivan when the two of them were studying theology at Thomas Aquinas College in Northfield, Mass. 

That’s where, by special dispensation, Emily explained, mass is celebrated in Latin, and why their middle daughter Mary Kathleen was so over-the-moon about the sonic beauty of that experience and, yes, wanted the new pope to reinstate it. 

Her grandmother Jeannie also expressed the wish that women might be elevated to deacon. ​“Women have been the backbone of the church, they’re a wealth of resources. I’m okay with women as deacons.”

Not so fast, said Emily Sullivan, who is steeped in Catholic tradition and has a careful, intellectually argued position different from her mother’s.

The two were also not afraid to mix it up a bit in the lobby of St. Mary’s, even on Mother’s Day.

“She’s older, but I’m more conservative,” Emily said. She spoke of women’s and men’s ​“distinctive gifts,” and hoped the new pope’s leadership would maintain just that, offering women more opportunities bring their ​“distinctive and unique gifts” to society and the church.

So why no deaconate for women? Asked your reporter, a former almost but Jewish seminarian himself.

“The church is bound by scripture and tradition,” she replied, ​“and Mary was not at the Last Supper. ​“It was an all male affair, and that’s where the lineage of the priesthood derives from, she said. Although Emily added, ​“she [Mary] is most due for priesthood, by virtue of her not being at the Last Supper,” women cannot be included.

The secular world, she said, even perhaps on Mother’s Day, pits men against women. Not so with the church where the gender roles are complementary, she said.

And then the Sullivan family went into mass, and on to their picnic afterwards.

Finally, back at St. Francis, for the all Spanish-language service, Miguel Correa was late (as I was) because the service was standing-room-only thronged, and parking hard to find.

Having grown up in Wichita, Kansas in a Spanish-speaking family and now employed at Sikorsky in Stratford, he said he feels great about Pope Leo’s background.

And not just the American born-ness but the pope’s Peruvian experience as well. ​“I really welcome it. It demonstrates we are a melting pot. It’s a fantastic way to represent America.”

“Politics and religion are sticky,” said Michelle Florez, who was sitting on the steps taking in the bright Mother’s Day sun with her thirteen-year-old son Deo. ​“If the new pope can shine light on issues, clear people’s minds, and add some hope, that’s what his role should be,” she said, ​“rather than a specific stand on any issue.”

A previous version of this story incorrectly stated that Yale’s Catholic chapel St. Thomas More is part of the citywide Blessed Michael McGivney parish. It is not, and remains independent.